It was 2pm ish this afternoon when I was queuing for a cup of my favourite hot chocolate at a cafe 2 blocks away from my house. It was just a small cafe run by a lovely old couple. The husband was the barista and the wife helped him taking the orders and doing the transaction. Indeed, their warmth service to their customers is the reason why I keep coming back to them.

Not that long queue actually, only about 2 more people to go before my turn, which was a middle-aged lady with a quite messy hair’s turn right now. I believe she was so tired and restless. It’s all shown under her eyes, yeah, a very thick black eye bags under both eyes.

“Hello, good afternoon! What can I get you for today?”, the cashier (which was also the wife) asked. “I just need a tall latte with extra shot on it, please”, she answered. “Order noted. And that’s gonna be $5.40 all together”. She grabbed her bag and started looking for her wallet. A minute later, and she was still stirring up everything inside her green bag. “Oh, great! Where is it??”, she softly mumbled.

After another minute, she finally raised her head, “Sorry, I guess I need to cancel it. I was in a hurry and didn’t realize leaving my wallet at home”. She sounded more frustated then ever. I could tell she was just having a very bad day.

“A tall latte with extra shot for the lady in yellow shirt”, the barista (and the husband as well) shouted from the coffee kitchen. “Oh no no no, sorry I just cancelled my order. Sorry for the late cancellation”, she said recitently.

“That’s okay. We just want to give you a small gift. We guess you just had a tough morning, didn’t you? We hope this tall cup of latte with extra shot can help to brighten up the rest of your day”, the wife said.

and there it was finally, the BIG smile on that middle-aged lady’s face..

———————————————————————————————————————-

Dear fellas,

How many gloomy faces you noticed around you today?
Have you found any? 1? 2?
or you don’t even notice there was few of those?

Often, remembering how many assignments from school or worrying about the thinning wallet are taking the whole room of our brain.
Sometimes we don’t even remember to ring back mother when we promised her to call back after meeting.
We just simply forget how it feels to share a little care for everyone around us.

Hey hey, I tell you what,
It is Valentine day..
The day of love. The day of sharing. The day of care.
So start looking at your left, at your right, at your back, at your front, at your every single angle and star S M I L I N G!
You’ll never know how a simple smile could make someone’s day, friends!
But more importanly, you’ll never know how incredible it is to see them smiling back at you :)

And when this day is over?
What day over? Hey, when February 14th finished in Australia, Americans have just started their loving day, guys!
So continue caring to one another.

And when America’s 14th of February has ended?
Aren’t you get used to be happy seeing people smiling back at you by that time?
So, why stopping?

Doesn’t it feel joyful to hear someone thanking you for being friendly?
And doesn’t it feel blissful to turn someone’s frowny face into a cheerful laughter?
Yes yes yesss, there is surely NO REASON to stop loving others.

Cos every single day is Valentine day.
Endless days of love..

‘I slept and dreamt that life was joy. I awoke and saw that life was service. I acted and behold, service was joy’ - Rabidranath Tagore

- Happy Valentine Day ♥ -

One question. Two different people. and two different perspective.

“What do you think love is?”

My 14 years old sister

H (Her): Like seriously you’re asking this question to me? Come on, sis, you’re much older than I am. You should have known what it is!
M (Me): Why not? I’m just trying to find out what love really is. Is it that hard for you to answer ey?
H : Geez, you’re useless! I guess love is just love, when you can’t stop thinking of someone you really adore. Someone who brings you smile even when he doesn’t do anything. Love is when you feel something different when you meet his eyes. People called it chemistry. Dude! everyone knows it. Where have you been all these time huh?  Silly!
M : And how can you find that chemistry? 
H : Of course it depends on how you see your prince! For me, I always have spark when I see Aaron, the captain of my school’s basketball team. He’s tall, he’s cute, he’s smart, He’s athletic, he’s every girl’s fantasy! You should see him doing his usual slam dunk. SOOO FREAKIN’ cool! Then you know what I’m talking about!
M : Soo, spark is the same thing with chemistry?
H : Well, it started with sparks and the chemistry grows. Okay, so chemistry is a feeling when you meet the man of your dream. And if you can’t stop thinking about him and you always try to find a way to get closer to him each day, then that when you’re in LOVE. Easy!

My 36 years sister.

H (Her) : Hmmm, let me think the best way to explain you. Loveee…
(silence..)
(still in silence..)
(so was it in the next 5 mins..) Okayyyyy..lemme just ask her questions to help her answering 
M : Is he someone you’re been dreaming for so long? The type of guy you like?
H : If you want a real answer, HE IS NOT! Haha. Hey, dun tell Shane or I will kill you definitely!
M : Well, depend on the reason why.. Shane is my best brother-in-law so far!! I just can’t pretend I know nothing in front of the people I love! Ohhh, and it depends on what dinner you’ll buy me too later. Hahaha!
H : You!! (tickling me hard)
M : Okay okay, white flaggg. Oh sis, I didn’t know you’re that wild! Hahaha. Now, back to the topic.
H : What? (thinking) Ohhhh.. yeah, love. Do you still remember Stanley?
M : Your ex?
H : He’s just the typical man I would date. He’s taller than me, handsome, is the best student in uni. He’s caring, he is romantic. Plus he never cheated on me!
M : Then why did you guys break up?
H : Because of jealousy. He’s too overprotective to me. Never lets me hanging out with my boy friends, even when there were many of us. I could stand it at the beginning, but that’s too much. I’ve understood him for too long and I was just too tired in the end. I guess as much as I love how I finally ended up with someone I did adore for so long, I just cudn’t accept how he treated me either. No trust. No space for myself. No reciprocity.

Shane is different. He might not the man I always dream. He’s shorter than me, very chubby, he doesn’t know branded stuff and never really concerns about what he is wearing. As long as he feels comfortable, that’s it. Seriously, never in my life I could imagine to spend all these years marrying him. But I never regret every single second I’ve spent with him. He just knew how to make me smile. He always listens to my stories and never complaints if I repeat them for hundred times. He cheers me up when I’m down. He knows how to calm me when my temparature is rising. And the important thing is I know he’s way too workaholic. He might loves his job more than me. But surprisingly, I can still be fine with it. 

I guess that’s love. When you can tolerate his worst habbit and still want to spend your days with him.. 

———————————————————————————————————————-

So, hands up if you still think love is a simple thing to explain.
Well, I still do :).

To tell you the truth, I used to see love as an incredible FEELING with sparks even when I couldn’t  meet someone I adore in person. Just like my younger sister does.
I concern about the height, the look, the face, the body.
I know, the sec my heart races just to think of someone and cudn’t really get calm down seeing him talking to the other girls, I’m in love.

But as time goes by, just like what my older sister explained, loving someone is not just about the feeling. Is not about the sparks, the chemistry.

Love is a DECISION. 

Whether he’s always late to the dates,
Whether he never really is on a diet though you keep asking him to do so,
Whether he keeps  forgeting your wedding anniversary,
or even whether he can’t really tell a funny joke.

But you still want to be with him. You still DECIDE to be in LOVE with him. Just because you know you’re happy when you’re with him even when he is annoying :)

Technically,
This is my 13th birthday greeting for you.
That’s if I gave you one each year ever since I knew you.
Or let’s say, ever since we started to talk and have fun :).

Unfortunately,
There were couple of years when we didn’t even remember who we used to be,
F R I E N D S.
Yes, totally two little strangers in two different schools.

Funny,
How we finally recalled back how we laughed so HARD again in senior high school.
When we were finally became schoolmates again :).

And that’s the time I learnt the word “F U N”.
Lucky we listen to the same music, so that we could really sing those songs we like loudly every time we do karaoke.
Lucky we taste quite the same food, so that I could really eat the dishes you recommend me to eat.
Lucky we see the same film, so that I knew who I could ask to watch those drama comedy movies together when I feel bored.
But from all of those, lucky we feel the same thing through every single thing we’ve been through together. L U C K Y, to have each other. Well, at least I do, do you? :D.

———————————————————————————————————————-

Dear Bestie,

Happy 24th birthday!
You’re not that little girl with the same uniform I was wearing anymore.
Soon, you’ll be wearing that white doctor coat with stethoscope hung around your neck.
You know how great you will be REAL soon, rite? :)
Wiser. More mature. Totally grown up!

But please don’t change in the inside.
Being someone who has a BIG heart and care enough to help others who need her help.
Someone who knows to where all the problems are solved, HIM.
Someone who keeps smiling even in her hardest time. Someone strong.
Being y o u r s e l f.

Surely there’s still a very long path for you to go through.
And sure life is not as easy as how it used to be. You know it.
But keep in mind, when world insanely tries to make you cry, show them thousand reasons for you to keep smiling.
Dun worry, I’m here for you if you ever need someone to listen to you, to cheer you, or even to argue with you ;).

So, once again, Happy Birthday.
I wish you joy. I wish you luck. I wish you success. I wish you good health. I wish you happiness. I wish you all the very best to happen in your life.

Really, I couldn’t get enough to thank Him for letting me knowing someone like you :).
- Best friend for life -

*dedicated for someone*

Dear Jesus,

Happy Birthday!
Is there anything You want from me, God?

If LOVING You is all You ask, You know I am.
Eventhough I know loving You is not as easy as saying it.
But You know I’ll fight for You.

I might not have a beautiful shiny heart like You do.
Mine is full of scratches and scars all over it.
But I always have space deep down for You to stay.

I might not have the sweetest smile liek You do,
even when I made you dissapointed over and over again.
But for You, I will try the best I can to keep smiling,
even in my hardest time.

I might not as strong as You are.
Sometimes I can’t help for holding my tears to fall any longer in the middle of my sorrow.
And sometimes I’m drawn too long among my problems and refuse to stand back when I fall.
But for You, I will always pray for faith and strength.
I’ll fight for survival within You.

Dearest Jesus,

I might have nothing to give for Your birthday present.
But search deep inside me,
and You’ll find a pure heart to love You.

Once again, happy birthday, Lord :).

Love,

The found sheep.

Does anyone know how many minutes it is in an hour? Correct! 60 minutes.
Does anyone know how deep Pacific ocean is? Yes Yes! about 12999 meters deep.
Hmm, next, does anyone know how long the great wall of china is? Wooo, you’re smart! It’s 8,850 km long.
Now, does anyone know how many days left to be with the one we love?
No? Anyone?

———————————————————————————————————————-

It’s Friday.
The day everyone’s looking for.
The end of working hours within a week, the momen where FUN begin.

I supposed to be putting on my make up, wearing my new satin dress paired with those white leather high heels and get ready for my 3th anniversary with him.

But I didn’t..

I can’t believe things change in just a blink of eyes.
He was here with me yesterday. Sitting in the same couch and watching his favourite movie show.
I still remember how annoying he was for keep asking me to get him lots of stuffs the whole show.
His iphone. His wallet. Coke. Chips. The remote. and nearly in every 20 minutes he wanted another glass of water.
Geez! How many litres had he drank for just a couple of hour??

Yes, pretty irritating indeed!
I couldn’t even get the story line of the movie. Thanks to you, boyfriend!
In the end of the movie, he finally realized how awful the face I made.
He asked me why and I said “I’m okay.” (just like every other girl usually answers).
He stared at my eyes and started throwing jokes.
One joke I acted cool. Like nothing could ever bring my mood back.
Two jokes my mouth started shaking, but I managed to hold my giggle.
On the third times, he added a little stupid face and ridiculous noise.
Oh MY! Who could ever control not to laugh for that expression huh?!
So I laughed loudly and forgot that I supposed to be mad at him.

He smiled and kissed my forehead.
“I’m sorry for paying more attention to the movie. I’m sorry for keep asking you this and that the whole movie. I’m sorry for dissappering that lovely smile in your face.”
And he cuddled me.
I didn’t know when, but by the time I heard those sentence, my lips already smiling.
“Thank you for bringing back my smile, hun. This is why I love you.”

It’s 6.30 in the evening now.
I am expecting a black metalic civic has stopped by in front of my house.
I am hoping someone with his silver watch getting out of the car and picking me up for the anniversary dinner he has set up since few weeks ago.
But here I am all by my self..
Sitting at the side he was sitting yesterday, crying over his unpredictable loss..

———————————————————————————————————————-

Dear fellas,

Sure, so many things around you that you can easily measure.
The tall of your wardrobe, the amount of shoes you have, the weight of your dog, the length of your house.
But could you even guess how many days left for you being together with the one you love?
I couldn’t. They couldn’t. You COULD N O T.

Think.
Have you forgived them for what they’ve done that dissapointed you?
Have you thanked them for their kindness, their sweetness, their love?
Have you taken a really good care of them?
Have you cheered them up and hug them whenever they need shoulders to lean on?
Have you apologized for your fault, your stupid crankiness, your selfishness?
Have you told them how much they mean for you?
How much you love them?

Have you made the best out of time while you are with them?

Cos life is not as long as you think you have.
And we’ll never know what’s next tomorrow.
So, please, DO while you still can.

“In the end it’s not going to matter how many breaths you took, but how many moments took your breath away” - Shing Xiong

*Just a made up story for relfection :)*

I know you’ll be having a new life soon
When there are plenty of new faces and new voices around you
And you’ll be tasting lots of new flavour in your dishes
That sometimes you love, sometimes you don’t

Obviously new people come into your life
And you’ll make lotsa new friends in just a blink of eyes
Eventho  you might struggle in maintaining the friendship cycle

Surely I believe you will be just alright ..

But  if one day you ever get lonely
and you start missing old times ..

Just remember our last trip to that boring place
Where there were not many entertaining spots to visit and the food didn’t taste as great as our city’s.
Well, except for the dumpling :).
The only restaurant that kept us addicted to come back over and over again.
But could you believe how BIG our laugh really was in each second 3 days in a row?

Remember how annoying I was to leave you asleep in the middle of your favourite movie
Not just once, but guess more than 5 times I kept doing the same thing
Hey, but also don’t forget how  irritating you were for keeping me hungry the whole afternoon trying my best waking you up!
Why were you that lazy huh?
But could you believe thru all this time we are still meeting each other?
Still calling each other b e s t f r i e n d?

Hey bestie,
Dun you ever worry about the whole new things around you ahead,
Cos I know you will completely be fine
Yes, you know you will ..

But if one day you have noone to listen to your story to share your burden to cheer you when you have a rough day
If one day you’re looking for someone to sing along with you to laugh on your jokes to tell you the truth 
And you’re missing someone to fight to debate to argue with you
You know where to find the one 
She’s just right   h    e    r    e  :)

“Whatever happened, you know how special you are to me”

And that’s the last time my aunt saw her beloved someone right before the special day of him finally became a husband of her best friend.

I wonder if today was a good timing to listen to this sad love story of her in this beautiful Saturday. But oh well, does teach me a lesson for sure :D

———————————————————————————————————————-

It was nearly 30 years ago since the first time my aunty met the most annoying boy ever in her uni. A type of creature that she would never ever even try to get close with. 

Funny how everything turned out just like the other love story. Through all those stupid fights and yelling, without even telling what they feel for each other, they already knew love had stopped by between them. And through all those tears, hugs and kisses were always healing the pain.

Everything went just fine till the day he had to go thousand miles away from her. Sad how finally they knew what they were in the end, just ‘friends’ (with feeling). He said there were no such thing as relationship in distance. Things would be just so hard for her to find how sad she would be when she needed him to be next to her and nothing she could do.

True, when it came to distance and time difference, the word “patient” and “understanding” seems slowly fading away. Was just too tiring to fight over the same reason, c  o  m  u  n  i  c  a  t  i  o  n.  And that’s how two ‘friends’ started becaming strangers.

Nearly 2 years since the last fight. Aunty just could not believe how real he was, standing in front of her again. It’s just amazing how the feeling didn’t change a bit from the way it used to be. The title was “Best Friend”, but they knew deep down their heart, there’s something more than that. 

Just an unexpected day, she found out that her close friend has feeling for him. And on each denial, he said he didn’t have feeling for aunty’s close friend when he knew he did. In the end, he admitted how frustating it was to choose between two amazing women. 

Everything seemed so complicated and confusing. Ego was everywhere. And nothing went just right. Aunty was the one who knew him longer. She was the one who more understood his most annoying side and still accepted him as how he was. And more importantly, she just knew how to bring a lil smile in his depressing days. Just too UNFAIR to whom she need to compete. Someone who knew him much lesser than she did. Someone who she called a Best Friend.

For almost half a year, the battle was still on. Aunty was clearly not someone who surrendered that easily. She knew what she’s doing and how to win what she wanted. It just didn’t work when it came to irrational thing named feeling. The situation didn’t change much. A boy with a puzzled feeling to decide which one he loved more. Just too HARD. 

One afternoon, she was relaxing her mind by taking a short walk around the park in the corner of her house complex. It’s always refreshing to see green overloaded everywhere, plus it’s Saturday morning. Perfect time to release the stress. After a few minutes walking, she finally decided to step aside the bench behind the fish pond, while suddenly she saw her close friend talking to her mom, sitting right on the same bench she was intending to sit.

“I won’t that easily give up, mom! No matter what! It’s not about how long she knows him more than I do, not about how closer she is to him compared to me to him either. It’s just how I love his smile when I throw some jokes. And how glad I am that he trusts me to listen to his stories. Sometimes he told me about how stressing it was to be in the middle of two adorable women who are equally important to him. You have no idea how sad it is to see someone you love to put that gloomy face everytime he talked about that topic.”

“But mom…
Whatever happen ahead, even if he finally chooses her over me, nothing could change how much I adore her as my best friend.
I would still be happy for both of them…”

Tears falling from her eyes. She just realized how selfish she was for ignoring his feeling and persistently imposing on how to loose her own best friend.Was that how she described herself as a perfect lover and a best friend?

———————————————————————————————————————-

“Sorry for making things harder for you all this time. I made it easy for you now. Surely I just want you to be mine as much as I did years ago. It never changes, even a tiny little bit. But clearly there is someone else who fight for you much more than I do. Someone who keeps struggling to win you and keep trying to beat how close we are. But also someone who still cares about my happiness. So, yes.. go for her .. “

“Whatever happened, you know how special you are to me”, what he finally said in the end after a long talk. 

And that’s the last time aunty saw her beloved someone right before the special day of him finally became a husband of her best friend.

———————————————————————————————————————-

Fellas,

Letting go someone we love is never an easy thing to do. Obviously, its harder than donating our favourite dress or giving our younger sister our only lunch meal. Is about letting go someone we care so much.

But how much you care about someone? How much more than you care about yourself? Have you listened to their stories, their opinion, their feeling? Have you given them time to think, time to decide? 

Have you considered to letting them go for their happiness? Cos really, that is what c a r e is supposed to be :).

“The greatest step towards a life of simplicity is to learn to let go.” - Steve Maraboli